The lost days of Bali.

Day 8: Was there a day 8

So day 9 is really not worth my thinking power, but here is what happened anyway…got screwed with a ride in the morning because the driver showed up with no roof straps, so we had to tell him to beat it bra, did end up finding another driver, that is awesome though.  Agus took us to Sanur which could have been a fun wave but there’s a thousand kooks. The motorbike ride there, ended up being more adventurous than  the surf.  Sparrow and Larry rode no more than 200 yards before being pulled over by a crooked cop, who charged us 8 dollars and kept pointing to his arm for some reason….needless to say the guy was a real deuche. The day turned around though shortly following the worst surf session we have had…hit Mcdonalds hard, with a big mac, followed by an hour long massage for five dollars, where only Larry and the Problem had to wear disposable thongs, that seriously rode the butt crack.  The lady was so far up my ass I was worried for her safety, especially after Mcdonalds, then on the front she was nearly touching me balls mate….I was half expecting her to say “banana buddy.”  Finally met up with Scott and Kim, who hooked Howie up with some more money, so we can ball dawg.  Had dinner at an Irish pub, with the worst Irish band ever, that was all Balinese, kinda like the Christmas Story when they go to the Japanese restaurant for Christmas dinner

Day 12: The cow field claims another...

Dude this shot is so emo dane is going to steal it and put it on marine layer

While attempting to check the surf this morning, team poop went down in a blaze of glory...Sean got the worst of it, covered in a mixture of cow shit and mud, fucking hilarious...but we all ended up following in their footsteps, just not as bad.  Surfed the left in Canggu again, kinda fun but really crowded with little balinese groms who shred and can paddle for days...we got our own though, and Sean souled it up some more...I think he took some notes over our breakfast from watching pappison soul it up on a board that looked way to big for him.  It's our last night so we are doing the lobster dinner on the beach and then seeing the vines play at this sick bar/restaurant called the Deus, that is as hip as any place in venice, with all kinds of triumphs and cafe racers for sale...did just find out though that we missed wolfmother play here for free like 4 days ago...fuckin blew it mate...lets keep our fingers crossed that team shitalot can pull it together to enjoy our last night...One more blog when we get to the airport to let you know how our ambient fueled flight back home was

Day 11: Thunder and Lightning Strike....

the best picture I have ever taken...took at least 5 minutes to shoot, because I couldn't stop laughing enough to hold the camera straight

Massive storm sweeps through Balian as we prepared to leave and destroys everything in the village...not really but it would make for a better story. Barely slept due to the thunder, that shook the entire house, while the Problem and Sean continued making their own version of thunder in the bathroom...it sounds like the part from dumb and dumber where he shits his brains out. Finally got to Canggu and got a little surf in, in the evening then hit up Ally Cats for some double doubles, while Howie and Sean slept the night away together...again...Oh saw an aussie guy that looked just like boomer in PCU, lose in a drinking game and then proceed to have three of his buddies slap his bare back as hard as they possible could...fucking kiwi. Talked to a fatty that was really trying to get me to go out with her and her friends and actually considered it for a second....when times get tough the tough get going, or something like that . So I noticed that our followers only comment during the weekdays, Kevin I know you are on your computer all the time goddammit, you guys better be getting down and dirty, Friday and Saturday, and maybe a thursday Sharkeez session?

Day 10: You Still A Live Bud.....

This picture explains it all for Howie...

Howie and Sean continue to own it in the bathroom, shitting every chance they get...I'm pretty sure their buttholes must be raw by now.  Shredded Balian one more time, which pretty much amounted to the most paddling we have ever done...a constant current that pulls away from the peak, I guess there is a first for everything though.  Oh and what's up with morons who push their girlfriends who can't surf into set waves, not only that but pushing them into it late.  Pretty much Sparrow and Larry claimed dominance in and out of the water while Sean and Howie gayed it up and took care of each other while their tummies "hurt" other than that just relaxation at its finest, brother, next it is back to Canggu for the last couple of days...

Day 9: Bagus…balinese for good for those who think I spelled bogus wrong.

Day 9: Bagus…balinese for good for those who think I spelled bogus wrong.

Got a ride from Sanur to Balian, which is up country as you can get.  Awesome beach front huts, over looking the surf spot, with no Brazilians, thank the fucking lord.  Scott and Kim came with us, it’s an awesome place with three rooms a kitchen and two balconies, with retarded views. The surf is fun with little crowd….thinking of nicknaming the spot The Problems, because Howie was killing it.  Sean seems to love the shoulder, though he did soul arc it up on one.  Howie has a serious case of vaginitis, his poor belly hurts, it’s weird because Sean suffered from the same  disease no more than a day ago…some of us weren’t cut out for the road I guess.


Pics to come.. bad location for the wee/fee............ and howie is shitting himself... a lot. 

Day 8: Was there a day 8

So day 8 is really not worth my thinking power, but here is what happened anyway…got screwed with a ride in the morning because the driver showed up with no roof straps, so we had to tell him to beat it bra, did end up finding another driver, that is awesome though.  Agus took us to Sanur which could have been a fun wave but there’s a thousand kooks. The motorbike ride there, ended up being more adventurous than  the surf.  Sparrow and Larry rode no more than 200 yards before being pulled over by a crooked cop, who charged us 8 dollars and kept pointing to his arm for some reason….needless to say the guy was a real deuche. The day turned around though shortly following the worst surf session we have had…hit Mcdonalds hard, with a big mac, followed by an hour long massage for five dollars, where only Larry and the Problem had to wear disposable thongs, that seriously rode the butt crack.  The lady was so far up my ass I was worried for her safety, especially after Mcdonalds, then on the front she was nearly touching me balls mate….I was half expecting her to say “banana buddy.”  Finally met up with Scott and Kim, who hooked Howie up with some more money, so we can ball dawg.  Had dinner at an Irish pub, with the worst Irish band ever, that was all Balinese, kinda like the Christmas Story when they go to the Japanese restaurant for Christmas dinner

Day 7: Hitting the streets

So tan, so mustache...

You think by now one of us could pull their head from their own ass and look to see what the name of our hotel is….well apparently we can’t because our driver was suppose to pick us up at our hotel at 7:00am to take us to Balian, a fun beach break  about 30 minutes from Canggu.  Instead he waited for a half an hour at the wrong hotel in a monsoon because we told him the wrong name, while Howie and Larry braved the elements, dodging falling tree limbs and stinging head on downpours and hit the streets on their motorbikes to find him.  Despite the flat out retardeness we didn’t really miss much because the waves were minimal and the wind was up.  Ended up surfing out front anyways in muddy cow shit water, saw Sparrow and KC get stuck in some puddle in the cow pasture, knee deep in cow pies with moped engine smoking furiously, and Larry get pissed off at the shitty mushy windy surf.  We thought Larry had converted to a complete Brazilian, or Swanson, with his brazen back paddling. Then we took to the streets again to try and find some cool shit….didn’t really find any cool shit but scored some serious core points for negotiating the local traffic by  honking, speeding and passing the pussies going to slow. We were tempted to pull over at a full on mushroom farm but thought it better not to tempt fate…maybe tonight in Kuta.

P.S. We need to give a shout out to those kooks who got skunked in Mexico, you should have spent your money wisely and came with us, and also to Frags for hooking us up with some solid local knowledge, because Ally Cats and Sky are fucking awesome….Aussie chicks galore.